Whether you are a Billy Joel fan or not, you probably remember his song, 'We Didn't Start the Fire.' Here it is, set to pictures... very cool.
I never did know all the words, and now I understand why! Turn up the volume, sit back and enjoy a review of 50 years of history in less than 5 minutes! Thanks to Billy Joel and some guy from the University of Chicago with a lot of spare time and Google.
Top left gives you full screen.... Top right lets you pause... Bottom left shows the year of each picture/event.
The older you are, the more pictures you will recognize. But it's great at any age.
Sit back and relax and enjoy!
LINK::: http://yeli.us/Flash/Fire.html
1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection... again.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this -- ever.
15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
18. My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day, "Dad, what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?
19. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
20. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.
Excerpts from an article printed in the July 2009 Mensa Bulletin:
"There are only three things to remember:
1. I will be happy.
2. I will make some money.
3. I will make other people happy.
One hundred percent of the people I saw agreed with the three, but not one of them had the order right! Get them out of order and it will fail, ultimately."
-- Bernard Kitt, Ph.D., psychotherapist's solution to personal problems
"Ignore bullies. If you can't ignore them, beat up the biggest one first."
-- Father to Amy B. Brennan
"My advice to all men is, yes, wash your hands after urinating if that useless gesture makes you feel better by conforming to a mistaken Victorian concept. But please, to protect yourself, wash your hands before urinating."
-- Arthur Belefant on the nature of germs and why you should wash your hands throughout the day
"Help that is not wanted is usually no help at all."
-- Jason Fenwi
Excerpts from an article printed in the July 2009 Mensa Bulletin:
Taking it to the Streets, by Nick Rotondo
Myth #1: Hit him in the jaw with your fist for a knockout punch.
Truth #1: Small hand bones are quite fragile compared to that of the mandible... A much more effective alternative is using the bony gabella - the major bone of the skull that forms the forehead. If it hard as a rock and, if launched correctly, can do great damage. To do it correctly, grab your opponent's shoulders with both hands and aim for his jaw. Because of the spatial illusion, this aiming point will ensure the gabella will strike your intended target, the nose, with a force sufficient to fracture the nasal septum. This will not only cause significant pain to your opponent, but will initiate a profuse flow of blood...
Myth #7: The fist is the hardest attack bone in the body.
Truth #7: Your elbow is a formidable weapon, used far too infrequently...
They like to be held, talked to, and touched often.
But push the wrong button and your ass is disconnected.
I have no idea if this is true. But it's funny!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This is a job application that a 75-year-old man submitted to Walmart in Arkansas. They hired him because he was so funny.....
NAME: Kenneth Way (Grumpy Old Bastard)
SEX: Not lately, but I am looking for the right woman (or at least one who will cooperate)
DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available .. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place
DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance pack age. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.
EDUCATION: Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
PREVIOUS SALARY: A lot less than I'm worth.
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.
REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.
HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.
PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m. Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment .
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 lbs.?:Of what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be 'Do you have a car that runs?'
HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes, so they tell me.
DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job - no!
On my breaks - yes!
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde supermodel who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.
NEAREST RELATIVE: 7 miles
DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Oh yes, absolutely.
Mrs.
Bacciagalupe comes to visit her son Anthony for dinner. Anthony lives with
a female roommate, Maria. During the course of the meal, Momma can't help
but notice how pretty Anthony's roommate was. She had long been suspicious
of the relationship between the two, and this made her more curious.
Over
the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to
wonder if there was more between Anthony and his roommate than meets the
eye. Reading his Mom's thoughts, Anthony volunteered,
"I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Mama, Maria and I are
just roommates." About
a week later, Maria comes to Anthony saying, "Ever since your mother came
to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver sugar bowl. You don't
suppose she took it, do you?" "Well, I doubt it, but I'll e-mail her, just to be
sure." So he sends his Mom an email: "Dear
Momma, I'm not saying that you took the sugar bowl from my house, and I'm
not saying that you didn't take it. But the fact remains that it has been
missing ever since you were here for dinner. Several days later, Anthony receives an email
response from his Momma. "Figlio mio, I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep
with Maria, and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with her. But the
fact remains that if she was sleeping in her own bed, she would have found
the sugar bowl by
now."
Love,
Anthony"
Funny commercial:
1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
2. Don't worry about what people think, they don't do it very often.
3. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian anymore than standing in a garage makes you a car.
4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
5. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.
6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
8. A person who is nice to you but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.
9. If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.
10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
11. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
12. A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good.
13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
14. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.
15. No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes.
16. A balanced diet is a muffin in each hand.
17. Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
18. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
19. Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.
20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
21. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
22. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
23. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
24. Someone who thinks logically provides nice contrast to the real world.
25. It ain't the jeans that make your butt look fat.
26. If you had to identify in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved it's full potential, that word would be 'meetings.'
27. There is a very fine line between 'hobby' and 'mental illness.'
28. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
29. You should not confuse your career with your life.
30. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
31. Never lick a steak knife.
32. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.
33. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.
34. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment
35. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that deep down inside we ALL believe we are good drivers.
36. Your friends love you anyway.
A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, "What does love
mean?" The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think:
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'When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore.
So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love.'
Rebecca- age 8
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'When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their
mouth.'
Billy - age 4
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'Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.'
Karl - age 5
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'Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.'
Chrissy - age 6
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'Love is what makes you smile when you're tired.'
Terri - age 4
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'Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.'
Danny - age 7
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'Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss'
Emily - age 8
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'Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.'
Bobby - age 7
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'If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,'
Nikka - age 6
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'Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.'
Noelle - age 7
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'Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know eachother so well.'
Tommy - age 6
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'During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore.'
Cindy - age 8
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'My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.'
Clare - age 6
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'Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.'
Elaine-age 5
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'Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford.'
Chris - age 7
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'Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.'
Mary Ann - age 4
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'I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.'
Lauren - age 4
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'You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it alot. People forget.'
Jessica - age 8
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And the final one
The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife.
Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said,
'Nothing, I just helped him cry'